Birria for Breakfast, Pool time, Fancy Dinner. Wednesday February 28, 2024

     I headed out of my hotel for my morning routine. I partook in a bad cup of coffee at a little cafe. I did some writing, but started to feel hungry. Apparently, the Birria taco is breakfast food. So, I had a little spot marked on my Google map from my pre trip “research”. It is called Tacos De Birria “Chanfay”. I found the place, and tried to figure out how it worked. There was a cart out front, where money, and condiments were handled. On the right, as you entered a quart yard was a griddle. The quart yard was filled with red plastic tables, and chairs. I walked up, and stood awkwardly were the money was handled. A lady came up, and I used my best Spanish to place my order. We then communicated in English. Since I was eating in, I was to take a seat in the courtyard. There was table service. I ordered three crispy Birria tacos, and a cup of consume. The tacos were great. Not as rich as I am used to, and they needed salt. There was salt on the table, and an array of condiments; a crispy chili oil, (salsa) a “normal” salsa, and a mustard squeeze bottle full of a spicy avocado salsa. There was a Tupperware container that contained diced white onions, fresh chili peppers, and lime wedges. The chilis were green, and smaller than the Jalapeños I know from home. I did not eat one. So, I can’t tell you much about them. The tacos were simple and nice. The tortilla was more toasty than fried. The meat was not as rich as what I am used to. I loaded mine with onions, salsa, and the spicy avocado salsa. It was a really nice experience. It cost me 70-some pesos, and I rounded up to 100 for the tip… I know “traditionally” Birria is goat. When I eat it at home it is beef. Beef is common here too. I have never eaten goat, and don’t know if I would recognize it. Sometimes I find lamb too gamey, and sometimes it is delicious. Is goat like lamb? Did I just eat goat? My gut feeling is no, but more research is needed. I am not expert, and if you stewed the right cut of lamb in chili cause. I am not sure I could tell you with confidence what it was.

     We completed a mid day walk, did some reading, and had some pool time. Nothing really eventful. At the pool, I came back from the pissour. My polyester shorts trap quite a bit of air when they are wet. When I pushed that air out, it got me quite a lot of attention from the other boys. I owned it, and laughed “trapped a little air there” It had all the boys laughing. I will admit, that though I am cool enough to hang at the pool with the gay boys. I am probably not as cool as some folks think I aut to be. I did privately joke to Dave at some point, “how come we are not as lean as the other gay couples?” I am a hedonist, and I am cool with the other consenting adults doing whatever brings them joy, with consenting adults. (if you are not cool with that, you are not as cool as I think you aut to be.)

     Dave was in the mood for a “fancy dinner”. Dave has worked in fine dinning, and enjoys a nice or “fancy” meal. I have been treated to some very fancy meals in my life. However, I will get just as much pleasure out of eating world class pedestrian food. Give me a can of Kulshan IPA. Put me in the back of a pick-up truck, and drive me out to La Guadalupana, in Harrah WA. (A small town outside of Yakima.) I will eat my world class food there, and keep more of my working class money, in my pocket.

     After some discussion, we settled on going to Serrano’s Meat House. We were seated to a table, and Pedro was our server. Dave perused the wine list, as I searched for the beer list. There was no beer list. Pedro told me he had Pacifico, Corona, and Modelo Negra. Dave got a red, and I got the Negra. I looked over the whole menu. I considered a nice steak. However, I don’t need 14 oz of meat. I can’t eat that much, and I sure as hell don’t want to waist it. I decided I would be that douche that orders the fancy burger at a steak house. I have been craving a burger. Dave had been telling me about a cut of meat sometimes called a Sirloin cap. I think he called in Picanha. It was on the menu here, and that was his choice. We split a Caprese salad, and there was chips, and salsa. The salsa course also included that spicy green Avocado salsa, and some refried beans with chorizo. It was a good thing we skipped lunch, because we were about to get after it!

     We munched our chips, and pondered what all was in the spicy green sauce. The salsa was a chipotle salsa, and reminded me of my brother Bob’s jared, smoked salsa. (He makes it every year out of his home grown tomatoes, and jalapeños. They get smoked with some wood from his back yard.) As we ate our Caprese, Dave picked up a unique flavor from the Pesto. I asked him if it was typical to include anchovy in Pesto? He replied, “It is not anchovy.” I offered the suggestion that it might be Worcestershire. Dave thinks I nailed it. I could not find my words at the time to explain it to Dave, but now I am at my computer. The flavor we call Unami comes from Glutamic Acid and Inosinic Acid. Your sources of Inosinic Acid are Anchovy, Asian fish sauce, and Worcestershire sauce. (England’s version of fermented fish.) Also; chicken, beef, and pork. Bacon is full of the shit. Glutamic acid typically comes to the table in the form of mushrooms, soy sauce, Miso, and Marmite. (I can’t access this information from my head, but I keep notes.)

     The main course arrived. My burger was 250 gr or 8.82 oz of ground beef. (I suspect a bit of that weight cooked out. I did not feel like I ate that much.) It had bacon, cheddar, grilled onions, and was served on a brioche bun that barely held up to the task. I had them skip the arugula. Rocket lettuce tastes like lawn clippings in my mouth. This burger met expectations. It was direly lacking salt, but I worked to fix that. It was cooked through. When I was not asked how I wanted it cooked. I decided I would just flow with the go. I aint rolling the dice on a medium burger in Mexico, if the seller aint offering…. My French fries were crispy and delicious. They were the kind that come frozen in a bag. At a food plant, a food scientist overseas a process where russet potatoes are cut, boiled, then fried, and frozen. The end user then fries them to order at ~350ºF. You get perfect french fries, every time.

     After a shower, I met up with Dave, I found him at a place called Birrieria Robles. It was more of a sit down place, with only the entrance open to the air. The logo is a cow, and a goat. Dave is more traveled than me. So, I asked him my goat question. He assumed goat would be dryer than beef, but also was not a self proclaimed expert. I tasted his consume, and it was richer than what I had. (I will be checking them out ASAP, and I am drinking decent coffee :-)

Dave’s cut of beef was a big chewy, under-cooked, pile of shit. He literally struggled to even cut it. He struggled with it for a bit in utter disappointment. When Pedro came back by, Dave politely let him know this thing was shit. Pedro took it away, and came back with a solution. Dave could have what he ordered, but it would be a long wait. Or, he could go with some kinda beef medallions, and they would be right out. It was 3 cuts of delicious beef, about 3/4” thick. It had excellent smokey grilled flavor, and was darn tasty. The salt was on point. However, I am pretty sure it was rare, not medium rare. Dave was quite satisfied. 

     After dinner we walked the water front to the Irish Pub. Ever since he lived in Ireland, it is Dave’s goal to drink at the Irish pub, in every city he visits. After the pub we called it an early night. Dave is having some digestive issues. At first he thought it might be related to overdoing some drinking. He also suggested that it could be a “water issue”. He has eaten some fresh salads. I sat in my courtyard and got caught up on my writing, while sipping the local yellow beer. My last text to Dave was a pragmatic solution to his problem. I suggested that perhaps he could barrow a “butt plug” from one of his neighbors…. 

I did not eat guacamole yesterday day. Fuck! I can’t fucking do anything right…